Can't You Just Be Still? Part 2

As Bryan and I were going through our morning routine, getting ready for work, he said in passing, “It was nice that Addalyn hung out with us last night.”  Addalyn is our youngest. I was caught off guard by his comment.  Addalyn hung out with us last night?  Oh, I do recall her sitting on the loveseat while I sat on the other couch, but I did not recall “hanging out” with her.  Why?  Because I was on my computer marking things off my list.  I worked a little on school tasks, worked a little on planning women’s ministry events, and worked a little on an upcoming wedding shower.  What I did not do was realize my 14-year-old, who is just fine spending the majority of her time in her room, chose to “hang out” with us in the living room.  And I blew it.  I didn’t interact.  I didn’t look at it as an opportunity to catch up with her.  I didn’t pour into her.  I just sat there on my computer… working. #momfail  Can’t I just be still and see the beautiful moments right in front of me?

The Robber Named Distraction

Part 1 of this blog series mentioned that the Lord has been dropping a lot in front of me about rest.  Along with rest, I’ve been reminded of how important it is to be present instead of constantly distracted.  I’m currently rereading How to Lead in a World of Distraction by Clay Scroggins.  He starts his book by describing a few personal experiences of being pulled in many directions and surrounded by distractions.  He breaks down the word distract and tells his readers the word means “to draw apart.”  How many times in a day do you let less important things draw you apart from more important things or people?  I would prefer not to answer that question.

For those of you who read Part 1, did you check your phone to see how many notifications you receive in a day?  Our phone is one of our biggest distractions.  Have you ever heard of  Phantom Vibration Syndrome?  It’s a condition where a person thinks their phone is vibrating or ringing when it’s not because the person is so tied to their phone.  We have a problem, folks.  I believe books are going to be written for years to come on the negative impacts of our addiction to our phones.  Most of us feel lost without them and don’t know how to fully function in a typical day without the “help” of our phones.

Imagine this with me:  You’re waiting for your car to be fixed at the dealership.  You’re on your phone, passing the time, when it suddenly goes dead.  You remember that your adorable teenagers “borrowed” your charger again.  (I’m not writing from experience or anything.)  You look around, and there is no reading material and no tv.  Does this send you into painful boredom, or do you feel comfortable with downtime?  Many people of this age are uncomfortable with downtime, quiet time, or no-acces-to-my-phone time.  

I asked my FaceBook friends this question: in a week, how much time do you spend alone with nothing playing (i.e. podcast, music, tv, ect) in the background?  Here are the results:

• 7% said less than 10 minutes

• 23% said 10-30 minutes

• 10 percent said 31 minutes - 1 hour

• 60% said more than 1 hour

As you can tell, I have pretty awesome FaceBook friends!  60% is very impressive!  I believe our God, who calls us to “remember the Sabbath day and keep it holy” (Exodus 20:8), “pray without ceasing” (1 Thessalonians 5:17), and “Be still…” (Psalm 46:10) wants us to spend some time in the quiet.  He clearly wants us to rest and I don’t believe he approves of our pace of life.  Distractions rob us of the rest, peace, and the abundant life the Lord has for us.

No wonder I feel prompted to be more mindful of rest, downtime, intentional quality time with others without being “drawn apart”, and a true sabbath!  If graded in these areas right now, I’m afraid i would have a big, fat, red F-.

Can any of you relate to this rushed, multi-tasking, never-finish-the-to-do-list way of life?  

Making a Change

On the Bible App, I found a devotional plan called “Burnout and God’s Invitation to Rest.”  Bingo!  That hit the mark.  On Day two of the six-day reading plan, the author fleshed out the difference between “good tired” and “dangerously tired.”  If we were honest with ourselves, we would realize that a lot of us have stepped into the “dangerously tired” zone.  I’m certain this is not where the Lord wants us, which is why he commanded us to rest.  He didn’t encourage or recommend.  He commanded!  The fourth of the ten commandments is “Remember the Sabbath Day and keep it holy.” Exodus 20:8  The Sabbath is a day of rest and worship.  God modeled this on the seventh day of His creation work.  

(Warning: I’m going to be a word nerd for a minute here.) Genesis 2:2-3 tells us, “By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work.  Then God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done.”  The original Hebrew word used here for rested is shâbath.  It means to cease, desist, rest. That’s where the word Sabbath comes from.  I’ll share more on this in Part 3 of this blog series.

Let’s get back to the Burnout Bible App devotional plan.  I knew I had a problem with my rushed state of life, but I hadn’t stopped to truly consider how it was affecting my body, my ability to serve, and my relationships- especially my relationship with the Lord.  I can’t even make it through an entire quiet time with Him in the morning without checking something on my phone.  The phone needs to stay in the other room!!!  The goal of this particular devotional plan was to get people to slow down and rest.  They even recommended some tips to get started.  One was to drive the speed limit.  Uh-oh!  Big Gulp!  That one’s gonna be tough for me. I’m always in the “fast lane” when I’m trying to get somewhere.  Our oldest daughter, Mallory, visited me at work one day and asked me as we walked through the halls, “Mom, why are you walking so fast?”  It’s just the pace of life!

I’m here to tell you, though, a miraculous thing has happened.  I’ve been driving the speed limit (sometimes), and it’s been so liberating.  Just this week, I drove all the way to Frankfort and set my cruise to the speed limit.  I didn’t feel rushed.  I didn’t get in trouble for breaking the law.  And I even got to take the time to look out the window and marvel at the beauty of the changing leaves all around me.  

I’ve realized over the past couple of months since pondering this idea of rest and slowing down that my normal speed of life is Russian.  (See what I did there?  Sorry!  Bad joke!)  I miss out on so much by trying to check all the boxes, do all the things, chase after the next big thing, check up on my FaceBook peeps, and do so many other things that are really not important.  

It’s past time we make a change.  What would happen if I took FaceBook off my phone?  What would happen if I would shut my laptop when my fourteen-year-old came into the room to hang out?  What would happen if I left my phone in the car on date night?  Is there a “What if” question or questions you need to answer?  In Part 1 of this series, I challenged us all to take the time to sit down with our families more to enjoy dinner together.  

Part 2 Challenge: Eliminate something that draws you away.  Our people deserve it.  And more importantly, God deserves it!  He doesn’t want a portion of our attention. He wants all of it.  

Poll for Part 3:  Visit my Facebook page to help with Part 3 of the Can’t You Just Be Still Series.

"Be still and wait patiently for the Lord." Psalm 37:7a